


Emily's Secret

by ShimmeringDarkness



Series: Criminal Minds Love [1]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:27:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24312733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShimmeringDarkness/pseuds/ShimmeringDarkness
Summary: This whole series is just going to be random, completely unrelated stories but more will probably have the theme of love or smut but some will be cutesy and fun or awkward team/family moments. Rated M because yeah.This story specifically bounced off a plot element in my story "Retreat to the Cabin" and I wanted to take Emily being super sexually innocent/frustrated in a wild direction where our favorite BAU boys open her eyes. Minus Reid because at least for this scenario I couldn't reconcile him in but if people want I'll make some of him not being quite as innocent as he seems.
Series: Criminal Minds Love [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1755139
Kudos: 4





	Emily's Secret

Emily was more than a little bored as she lounged around her house for the 4 day weekend they had off. They’d been on a long string of cases and had gotten Thursday through Sunday guaranteed off. JJ and Will had taken Henry down to New Orleans, Spencer had gone to visit his mother, Garcia and Kevin were on a hippie retreat of some kind now, not that she really remembered what Garcia had said about it, but she’d had someone to hang out with for the first day, but now she was alone, and neither of the girls would be back until Sunday morning. Morgan was probably bar hopping and picking up girls left and right, as for Hotch or Dave, she had no clue but figured they wouldn’t be the answer to her boredom, especially since Hotch was probably enjoying his time with Jack. She sighed and plopped onto her couch with a book she’d been wanting to reread for a while, but internally hating she couldn’t sleep all day like some people she knew even if she had the time and it was still early Friday, it was going to be a looong, boring weekend. She had actually been talking and civil with her mother lately but she was at a week long conference in some country, so she was out too. Emily sighed resigning herself to being alone, she could probably crash something Hotch and Jack were doing, she adored the kid, and the two adults had gotten a lot closer as of late, occasionally getting together outside of work, and providing an honest outlet when they were knotted messes from their job, but he deserved this uninterrupted time with his son. Rossi, as she thought about it, was just as likely as Derek to be sweeping some woman off her feet, his reputation was at least mostly based in truth, she was pretty sure. She sighed at her non existent sex life in comparison, she had nearly gotten raped when she was 15 and since then she had tried once and nearly had a panic attack so she was technically a virgin, but she didn’t think she’d ever get past her mental block. She loved going out to bars with the girls, but practically refused to talk to guys. After a few years she had finally revealed her issues to JJ and Pen, who were then accepting that she had no interest in picking up a random guy. Every so often Garcia would get it in her head that if they just found the perfect guy she would actually have good sex but for now that wasn’t happening.

She settled in with her book, reading for a good couple of hours, until she started to get hungry at lunchtime and set her book aside to rummage through her fridge for a snack, finding some chicken and making a little slider and some chips. She settled on her couch and flipped on the TV while she ate lunch, noticing it was only 1:00. She had just finished lunch when her phone rang, and so eager to talk to literally anyone, answered without reading who it was. “Prentiss.”

The voice that came over the phone wasn’t one she had expected, having pulled the phone away from her ear slightly at Garcia’s boisterous energy. “Hi Emily! We just got to the retreat and I managed to convince the peeps here it was necessary to keep my phone on me, you know FBI agent and all, which was super awesome because we all know I couldn’t go that long without at least one of my babies, anyways how are you?!”

Emily shook her head at the woman who was one of her best friends on the planet, and slightly nuts, but said “Extraordinarily bored, I’ve been lounging on my couch in frumpy clothes all day.”

She could hear an exasperated sigh come over the phone before Garcia said “Well we can’t have that, nope, I’m not going to allow you to wallow by yourself the whole time I’m gone. Up, right now and walk to your closet.”

Emily sighed, “Pen, I’m not going anywhere, why do I need to get dressed.”

“Oh my brunette missy, you are in fact going somewhere, we are going to get you looking _hawt_ and then you’re going out to go out and go shopping for at least 2 new cute outfits and a new dress for our next girls night. Photographic proof will be required and you should know by now that your online life highly recommends following my requests. So, are you in your bedroom yet?” 

Emily sighed and stood up wandering back to her bedroom before saying, “Yeah, standing in front of my closet, can I get myself dressed or are you doing that too?”

Penelope made an admonishing noise over the phone “You ought to know better by now missy, knowing you, you’d just go out in sweats and a t-shirt avoiding the whole point of dressing you up and making you feel cute and confident for a shopping trip…. So, let me think, what should you wear… ooh, do you have that dark purple dress you wore when we all went out, which time was it a couple months ago? Fitted top half with the zipper in the back, loose flowy bottom, that’s kinda casual but still makes your body look hot.”

Emily flipped through her closet pulling out what she though she remembered wearing to a club with the girls a few months ago, “Yeah but Garcia, I wouldn’t wear this to go shopping.”

Pen sighed dramatically over the phone “That’s the point woman, you would wear sweatpants and a hoodie, it’s good to make the boys drool a little and lady you’ve got the stuff to flaunt.”

Emily rolled her eyes glad they were on a call and not facetime, “Pen, you are aware I’m not trying to pick people up at the mall right?”

“Oh phooey, you my darling need to get laid and I am taking advantage of this opportunity to try once again.”

Emily sighed and put the phone on speaker pulling her current hoodie off so she could put the dress on to appease Garcia, go shopping for an hour or too, then come home and get drunk, but still talking while she did so, “Pen, you know that’s not going to happen, sex sucks for me, there’s no point to your argument.”

“I will find mr. magical for you yet, we just need to find someone who doesn’t suck at sex and knows how to take care of a woman.”

Emily sighed but slipped the dress on and took her yoga pants off, begrudgingly admitting that having something to do and getting herself actually out of her frumpy clothes helped her mood dramatically.

25 minutes later, having satisfied Garcia with her clothes change, she headed out to the mall, wishing the girls were there to go shopping with, but actually enjoying just meandering through the stores. She found a hilarious t-shirt and a new shirt for work that looked nice but was the smoothest material she’d ever felt. She found some cute workout shorts, and a new pair of skinny jeans that had decorative stitching on the back pockets that was still subtle, but made her smile. Now she just needed to find a new dress to finish PG’s assignment. The next store she entered, she immediately found a gorgeous sequin-y emerald dress that she probably would’ve bought even without Garcia’s directive. ([ https://us.shein.com/V-Back-Sequin-Bodycon-Mini-Dress-p-324879-cat-1727.html?url_from=adpladress161025718M&gclid=CjwKCAjwqpP2BRBTEiwAfpiD-7NzCB2MyhEbh13BV8iDh4T6L8tnqGxeYu2FH0o62seF30I_QHU3tBoCebAQAvD_BwE ](https://us.shein.com/V-Back-Sequin-Bodycon-Mini-Dress-p-324879-cat-1727.html?url_from=adpladress161025718M&gclid=CjwKCAjwqpP2BRBTEiwAfpiD-7NzCB2MyhEbh13BV8iDh4T6L8tnqGxeYu2FH0o62seF30I_QHU3tBoCebAQAvD_BwE)) She loved it, and it would definitely get used at the next girls night out. She sent the required pictures to Penelope before settling back on her couch to watch the Star Trek that was on, while also thinking about what to do for dinner. 

The movie ended and her phone buzzed a couple times after the movie ended, and seeing it was her, Pen, and JJ’s group chat, she smiled opening it up.

Penelope had added the pictures targeting JJ to see the new clothes Emily bought, getting a quick response from the lady in Louisiana.

“Hey Em, oh my god that dress is sooo cute!”

Emily laughed before responding “Thanks! New girls night outfit, how’s Louisiana?” 

JJ quickly responded with the lovely time they were having and PG pestered her for details, before revealing her first few hours at the retreat, saying they had found another couple who were hackers and were having a lovely conversation. After nearly 30 minute Emily sent out a text saying “I think I’m going to go have some food because it’s 5:30 and I’m going to have a snack, get drunk, and probably make some stupid decision to combat my boredom, love you both.”

The two let her go but not before JJ suggested that going out and getting drunk wouldn’t be advisable since neither of them were there to bail her out if she got herself arrested and she didn’t think that Emily would want to explain that one to one of the guys. Emily laughed and sent back her acknowledgement she would stay home and get drunk with a laughing emoji. Garcia had tried to apologize for leaving her alone, and suggested she try to find one of the guys to do something with, but Emily had said she didn’t want to interrupt their plans, and she would be fine adding in a joke about how they abandoned her to be lonely and get arrested.

She should have known her friends would worry about that and not let it go, as exactly 5 minutes into her flipping through take out menus while watching some TV her phone rang again. Assuming it was JJ who had seemed most worried about her being lonely in her last texts to her, she answered "JJ, I promise I won’t go out and get myself arrested for public intoxication, enjoy your time in New Orleans, I’ll be fine.” in a mildly annoyed voice.  
The deep laugh over the phone confused her as she pulled the phone away to see who it was before sighing and saying “Sorry Rossi, I thought you were JJ, what’s up.”

"Bring beer and chips darling"

"What?" Now Emily frowned in her confusion.

Dave's laughter flowed over the phone again, but this time she could hear someone else, wait was that Derek’s laugh? She didn't have time to ponder it though before he spoke, "JJ and Pen texted the three of us still in DC to figure out what we were doing. They were apparently worried about you being lonely and getting drunk on your own, but conveniently we were having a guys night at my house and watching some baseball games so bring enough beer to get the job done, and I have wine and everything else and Derek brought his crab dip but were out of tortilla chips, so we need some more."

Emily shook her head “Rossi, I don’t want to intrude, that’s exactly what I told Garcia at like 1 today why I didn’t try to bug one of you guys.”

“You're not intruding if you're invited, so get your butt over here.”

Emily just laughed “Fine give me like an hour or so.”

She heard Derek yell apparently over speaker phone “Jeez girl, I never thought you were one of those women that take an hour to do your makeup.”

Emily growled at him, “I’m not, I need to take off my makeup and dress and stuff, Garcia made me go out, and dress up so I wouldn’t mope around my apartment all day, and then I have to get redressed.”

Dave rolled his eyes at the other two guys standing next to him “Just get your butt over here before I text Garcia, whatever you’re wearing is fine, and bring your go bag just in case you get too drunk.”

Emily rolled her eyes but just said “Fine, I’ll be over in 40 then, with your tortilla chips and plenty of beer.”

Rossi accepted that and hung up.

Emily drug herself from her couch quickly fixing her hair before grabbing her go bag for ease and heading to the car. She stopped by the grocery store and got the requested food and drink, before getting to Rossi’s in 35 minutes. She pulled her SUV in, stepping carefully as she had realized at the grocery store she hadn’t changed from her cute low grey heels that she was wearing to match the dress Garcia forced her into like she’d meant to, and didn’t want to nearly roll her ankle again.

She opened the backseat door as the three guys came wandering out. Her partner let out a quiet whistle when he saw her in the dress prompting her to slap his arm when he got close and hand him the beer while saying “Seriously Derek, you’ve seen me in far more sexy clothing when we go to a bar or when I go under on a case.” He was quick to try and defend himself, “Argh Prentiss, but then it’s more work and now you look more like you, it just fits you, you look good in the dress, not that you don’t normally, but.” Dave cut him off with a hand on his shoulder as Emily crossed her arms and stared amused at him digging himself a deeper hole, not that she was actually offended but it was fun to mess with him.

Dave spoke “Morgan, you’re just making it worse, I would shut up and take the woman’s beer inside.” Derek nodded and turned back to the house as Emily let out a laugh, “I made the ladies man Derek Morgan floundering, maybe I should thank Garcia for making me wear this, that minute was worth it.” Both Aaron and Rossi laughed, grabbing her go bag and chips from the backseat as she slid her purse over her shoulder before following them in.

The four entered and headed into Rossi’s massive living room. Derek and Aaron dropped the beer and chips on the coffee table before sitting down with Emily and Derek flopping down on one of the massive sofas and Hotch and Rossi both sitting in fluffy armchairs. The group sat in a companionable silence for a moment watching the baseball game on TV before Emily reached forward and grabbed a beer, downing half of it in the first gulp. Derek looked at her with raised eyebrows “You weren’t kidding on planning on getting drunk were you?” Emily turned to look at him like he was dumb before saying “Noooo, I planned on getting blackout drunk in my apartment but since you all and the girls decided to get involved in my pity party and make me come here or ruin my credit, I’m now getting drunk here.” Dave looked at her “Can I ask you something?” Emily looked at him thinking about her answer before saying “Sure, and just for the record I’m going to apologize now, 4 beers is usually when any type of filter disappears so I’m sorry if I say something incredibly inappropriate in advance, it’s also when I become incredibly more honest just please don’t make me say anything that's embarrassing because we still have to work together, you have now been briefed on Drunk Emily rules, go ahead.” The guys snickered slightly at her warning but Dave said “Noted, why did you assume JJ was calling you about getting yourself arrested when I called?” Emily laughed and took another drink of beer “Because before they texted you I’m assuming, we were all in a group chat and I was talking about my lonely pity party and drunk plans and I get a lot more outgoing when I get drunk so she was worried I would go to a bar to get drunk and then get myself arrested for something stupid without them there. Which is contradictory because if they were here then I wouldn’t have had a pity day until Garcia forced me to get dressed and go out so I wouldn’t have gotten so depressed and lonely but sorry yeah, because she didn’t want me to go out to a bar on my own basically.” The guys nodded and their attentions turned back to the game on TV, Emily didn’t really care who was playing, but she did notice it was only the 6th inning so she had plenty of time to eat the delicious food Rossi had made and drink beer. 

She finished her first beer and set it to the side table next to her and grabbed a second one, while the other guys were still on the ones they had when she got there. She took a long drink of the beer before relaxing back into the sofa and content in the silence, but significantly happier than she was at her apartment alone. During the top of the 8th inning she finished her second beer and grabbed a third. She was just finishing her third beer as the baseball game was nearing an end and she reached for a fourth. She started the fourth and significantly less closed up than Agent Prentiss would ever be around her colleagues, she was clearly relaxing with the alcohol leaning into Derek’s side slightly and resting her head on his shoulder.

She was nearly halfway through her fourth bottle when the game ended and Derek turned his attention to the beautiful woman leaning on him, she was obviously less wound up, but by no means looked drunk. “Dang Prentiss, you can really hold your alcohol, I mean I knew you could drink more than Reid, but you barely look affected.” She tilted her head up and gave him a smile before saying cryptically “There’s a lot you don’t know about me.”

Taking advantage of her much more open countenance at the moment and only feeling slightly guilty since she wasn’t really drunk yet, Derek asked “So tell us one thing we don’t know about you?”

Emily shifted slightly but didn’t pull away from Derek and after a minute where Derek was guessing she wasn’t going to answer she finally said “When I was undercover with Ian, there was a time when I really did care about him and it wasn’t an act and I still feel guilty about that to this day.”

Derek rubbed her shoulder “That’s not something you need to feel guilty about Em, you spent every day with him for months, a year, however long your whole cover lasted, you saw more than just the monster or the criminal, no one faults you for that.” He pressed a gentle kiss against her head. Trying to shift off topics that obviously depressed Emily, Rossi flipped the TV off and said “Well I am going to take advantage of you not being so closed off to ask you everything I could ever want to know.” Emily let out a little laugh and sat up, taking a drink of her fourth beer that was just over halfway gone now and shrugged, “Why not, Emily Prentiss, open book for one night, but I get to ask all three of you embarrassing questions.” Derek and Rossi both nodded and she looked to Aaron who immediately protested “Wait, how the hell’d I get pulled into this.” Emily shrugged and said “You’re sitting here.” Aaron shook his head “whatever, you’ll be drunk enough that you forget by tomorrow anyway, I hope at least.”

Dave spoke first “You’ve made it more than obvious you rebelled against your mom growing up, what’s the worst thing you did?”

Emiyl laughed “What didn’t I do, other than sleep around, I didn’t do that, but smoke, drink, drugs, dye my hair, wear all black, piercings, I actually got a tattoo too but I’m not totally sure she knew that one.” 

Aaron and Dave both raised their eyebrows at that whole statement but Dave asked “What drugs?” 

Emily tilted her head “Mostly weed, I mean, I wasn’t trying to get myself addicted for life, I just wanted to fit in, no judgment right no matter what I say?” 

Dave shook his head “Never, you know that.” 

“Coke, occasionally, and Molly once or twice, but I uh, the molly, a friend gave me some at a party once and it was uh laced, or cut with ketamine, and it was awful, I felt like I was dying, that was what finally kicked me off any kind of drugs for good, realizing what I was risking with my stupid decisions.” Her eyes widened as she seemed to realize she admitted all that in front of her boss and she was quick to look at him and she spluttered “Wait, Hotch, I swear I haven’t done anything since I was a teenager, I would never do anything on the job I swear.”

Hotch smiled gently, “Nothing these nosy investigators pry out of you will be held against you, never. Besides, I didn’t think you had, you’ve never once looked like you were under the influence on the job. Can I ask something though?”

Emily nodded “Go ahead, that’s probably one of my worst secrets so shoot away.” 

“When, uh, were you doing drugs when I worked for your mom, well specifically when I was assigned to you?” 

Emily let out a slight chuckle, “You want to know if I was doing drugs like that under an FBI agent’s nose?”

Hotch nodded with a slightly sheepish look, “This might sound slightly ridiculous but you acted out against your mom because she wasn’t there for you with her job and I guess I thought about Jack and if I was leading him in that direction with our job and everything, so I guess, I mean he’s 6 now but I always assumed that if he ever did drugs or something I would be able to tell because I was an FBI agent, but well, I worked for your mom, hell I was assigned to your detail specifically for a couple years, and I never knew.”

Emily sent him a smile, “Um, yeah I was, you worked for her from when I was what like late 16 to early 20s right. I started when I was around 15 so by nearly 17 I’d had plenty of practice hiding from agents before you, and even though my mom was well aware, she couldn’t find anything, and she wasn’t going to risk the public finding out about her daughter. But personally, I see a lot of differences, you care about your son, and you show it, you give him when you are available which would’ve made a huge difference for me if I had someone stable at home. Also, I think you would be able to tell now if it was Jack because he’s more than just the job to you, he’s your son, and your not a new agent on your first assignment anymore, you have experience. And if none of that helps you feel any better, I have subtly, and will keep an even closer eye on Jack and Henry, and any other BAU kids as they get to their teenage years, because I know what things look like that you just can’t understand unless you’ve been surrounded by druggies before, more than just the job could ever expose you too, and I will do everything in my power to keep them from falling down that trap, and I’m sure Reid would too.”

Hotch nodded with a slight smile,

Derek looked curiously thoughtful before asking, “Wait, rewind, you have a tattoo?” 

Emily laughed “More than one.”

“Can we see?” 

“Uhh, yeah mostly. I have this one on my ankle, that’s the one from when I was a teenager. I was drunk but fortunately not stupid and I actually don’t regret it, I like it’s meaning now. The point of it wasn’t to have a crappy tattoo, it was simply to bother mother and any tattoo would do so I actually got a good one. It has more meaning now, but back then, the American flag was to represent that no matter where my mother took me the US would always be home and that was the one part of my identity no politics could change. The amusing story there is that the flag that’s there is actually not the original tattoo I got. The first one was from a really shady place to do 16 year olds with no parents, and the dude did something wrong and it started getting red and it never healed right. I have pictures when I looked good though, but eventually the color started lifting and my skin had some reaction the closer to the surface it got, after only like a year, and I ended up getting it surgically removed. There’s a faint line through the middle of it where that mess happened, but I never got it redone. Then I started going undercover for my career and tattoo’s could have destroyed a cover so I didn’t get any until I came to the FBI and decided I was done with anything undercover. I had been keeping a list for years, and the very first one I got was the flag redone, exactly off of pictures of my teenage self. I have a couple other meaningful things but my other favorite is small angel wings on my right shoulder blade, that said no matter the bad I did on the job, there’s always a little good left, you just have to find it and let it lift you up.”

Derek nodded and thought for a minute before saying “My baby girl once said that you three ladies shop for anything and everything together, and I was curious if that applied to like personal stuff too, because I know I would never want to buy boxers or something with another guy, friend or not.”

Emily laughed and nodded “I don’t know exactly what you mean but yeah, the three of us have bought all sorts of things, lingerie, well I didn’t get any but PG and I helped JJ shop for Will, pads and stuff, easy, we go bra shopping sometimes. It’s way less awkward with friends there that love you, trust me.”

Derek laughed and put a hand up “Okay, okay, got it, I will take your authority on that topic.”

Aaron spoke next “I am well aware this is probably not appropriate but I’m pretty sure we knew that nothing about this night would end up appropriate, but I’ve been curious and Haley would never tell me, why do girls go to the bathroom in groups? Even on a case JJ and you usually go together if we're not in the middle of an emergency.”

Emily smiled “It’s not really a secret, but there’s a lot of reasons, hold your crap while you take care of lady things since most women’s clothes don’t have pockets, just so you don’t have to end the conversation, so everyone can touch up makeup, guys are usually less grabby and pushy, less likely to try and get you alone if you stick with your whole group.”

Dave frowned, “Does that happen that often?”

Emily’s face darkened from the relaxed state the alcohol had put her in and she bit out a harsh yes making the guys’ faces also darken, but Hotch picked something else up from her face, something personal.

He leaned forward to look at her and said gently, “Emily, did something ever happen to you?”

Emily was silent for a long while, but that was enough for the men to feel an intense anger at the awful human beings who would do anything to a woman against her will. Finally she spoke quietly, “I was only a teenager, a kid, I didn’t choose who my mom was, I didn’t ask for him to touch me.”

Derek was quick to soothe her, knowing how she felt probably more than the other guys, “Princess, look at me.” He tilted her head toward him when she didn’t look up, before continuing “Em, you did not ask for someone to do anything to you against your will, hell even if you did you have a right to say no or stop at any time, and you were a teenager you said, you can’t consent anyways that’s not old enough.”

Emily sighed and shook her head “I know, it’s just, I can’t help but hate him, how he affected me, because he didn’t rape me, he didn’t get that far, someone came into the alley before he could I fought so so hard, but he was so strong. It was one of my classmates too, I didn’t have class with him but he was in my year, I was 15 and we were in Italy, I was in a park avoiding my mother for some reason or another, when someone grabbed me and dragged me down an alley. He was about to put his you know in when the shopkeeper had come out for a smoke break and pulled a gun on the guy. I didn’t ever even get to thank the guy, I just ran as fast as I could as soon as I could get away, but the worst part wasn’t that, I was so good at sneaking out of out house in Italy at that point that I got back in without one guard noticing, and when I locked myself in my room, my mom tried to talk to me once, before she got a work call, and didn’t come talk to me again for the rest of the week I locked myself in my room. That’s why I started doing drugs, I needed something to block the memories, since it seemed like no one cared.”

Derek pulled her into a hug and Aaron moved to her other side while Dave sat on the coffee table in front of her. She shook her head and said “I’ve moved passed it, I finally talked to someone, and it doesn’t bother me as much anymore, but there’s one thing he screwed up for me and I hate it.”

Dave rubbed her knee “What did he screw up for you, and what was his name, I think he might find his name on a wanted list soon.” Aaron and Dave laughed and Emily nearly laughed at her uptight boss’ ignoring the rules but she shook her head “It wouldn’t matter, and he’s dead anyway, he died in a car crash a few months later. The whole school mourned such a wonderful life. I didn’t. I was thrilled I wasn’t watching over my shoulder constantly to see if he’d try again.” Aaron didn’t like how she avoided the first part of the question so he tried asking again. “What did he do to you that you can’t move on from Emily, maybe we could help?” Emily turned a bright red as half her mind warred with the other, until she finally spat it all out in a rush “He didn’t take my virginity because the shopkeeper stopped him but he fucked with my brain so bad I never could in college or anything, but now that I could actually probably have sex without having a panic attack, I’m so old it’s weird.” She buried her head in her hands barely able to reconcile that she had just admitted that whole sentence to three guys she worked with. Three hot guys nonetheless, she wasn’t blind, all three of the guys sitting in front of her were sinfully hot, but they worked together, and someone as perfect as the three of them would never want her anyway, it was fruitless to daydream when the only way that could end was embarrassing for her

Eventually she felt someone’s hand tilt her head up and she tried to fight it but the hand pulled her head up to make eye contact with… Rossi, she should’ve guessed. “Sweetheart, why are you embarrassed by that?” She looked at him like she was an idiot before resigning herself that they were going to talk about this. She realized her buzz was pretty much gone after that stressful conversation she reached for another beer but a hand stopped hers. She turned to glare at the owner of the hand… Aaron, who didn’t look phased at her glare he just said “I think this is something you need to talk about, and if your drink more you can just forget any of this ever happened, but I think that you need this, to know that no one’s judging, and if they are they’re not worth your time.” She tried to protest saying she wasn’t even slightly drunk anymore but he held her hand back until she gave up and sighed “Why am I embarrassed “Oh I don’t know because I’m a woman in her mid thirties who had never had sex in her life.”

Derek turned her to look at him “And? Someone did something traumatizing to you, if you're not ready to try again that’s up to you and only you.”

Emily sighed “That’s the problem, I do want to but I don’t want to just do it with someone random. I tried like twice since then. Once was a college boyfriend but I hadn’t done any therapy yet and just felt disgusting, so he never even got my clothes off. The second was a boyfriend right when I joined the FBI. It wasn’t a very healthy relationship looking back but he told me we’d been dating for long enough and he needed sex so I agreed to try and ended up nearly unconscious from a panic attack because he wouldn’t slow down, after that he broke up because I wasn’t fulfilling his needs. And yes I realize now what a jackass he was.”

Aaron spoke this time and she looked at him “Okay, so if you think you’re ready, start going out on dates again. If you meet someone you like, you trust, and like we said earlier, if they can’t go slow enough or don’t take into account your feelings they’re not good enough for you. Emily sighed, “That’s all great in theory, but literally like any of the guys I trust enough work for the FBI and would never agree to that, or they’re in a relationship.”

Derek pretended this whole big acting job slapping his chest before saying “Oh Princess, you can stop dropping hints now, of course I’ll sleep with you.” Emily’s mouth dropped open and she forced a laugh with the other guys as she rolled her eyes, but she couldn’t stop the thoughts from earlier from returning, that maybe she should ask one of the guys, after all she trusts them with her life basically weekly, why not this? It was something she’d briefly thought about before tonight but always dismissed it as embarrassing for her. She shook her head and forced another laugh willing the conversation to move along. Aaron laughed and said “Derek, she’d never want to have sex with you, your such a playboy and the whole team knows it.”

More than willing to get into this alpha male argument Derek spoke back “Hey, just means I have plenty of experience, you were married to the same woman for years.”

Aaron snorted “Then I must’ve been doing something right because we know how much she hated my job.”

Emily tried to will the conversation to a new topic with her mind before anyone noticed her odd expression, but of course she had no such luck. Rossi and his damn expert profiler eyes didn’t miss it. He didn’t miss the blush that colored her cheeks. The way her eyes darkened slightly, how her laugh was fake. He leaned forward tilting her to look at him. “Would you like that, Em?" he whispered. His breath warmed her face slightly as she shuddered. Hotch and Derek had quieted looking at her with unreadable masks on, but Dave continued probing gently. "You want to lose it to one of us, don't you?" His voice was barely a whisper, low and raspy. Emily paused before hesitantly mumbling out “I had thought about it before, but I never thought it would be a good idea.” 

Aaron turned her to face him, and she was shocked by the... was that lust hidden in his expression when he asked ‘Why would it be a bad idea. You want this, and trust us, so?” Emily swallowed thickly, “I mean, all three of you obviously have experience, hell two of you are kinda famous for your reputations. What if I suck, what if I have another panic attack or I can’t do it. Not to mention I have scars from Doyle and everything, I’m not exactly a picture of beauty and you three are well, kinda perfect humans.” Aaron put her hand on his chest, “you’ve seen my scars, did you ever say they were my fault, i deserved them, ever judged me for them?” “What no of course not, you were protecting your family, you survived, they’re not ugly….” She trailed off as he moved her hand to her own stomach and she realized what his point was. He spoke “And you were protecting us, your family, from Doyle, so why are yours any worse? Emily looked down “I never thought of it that way.” She was pulled back to Dave as he brushed a hand gently over her lip before saying “If you have a panic attack we’ll stop, but we won’t let it get that far. If you want to stop we stop. We go at your pace, no faster. And for experience, well, wouldn’t more experience be better than less so we can be less likely to cause you pain.” Emily nodded slowly and Dave continued by asking “So you do want to lose it to one of us then don’t you?” Emily nodded again very slightly and Derek finally spoke again, looking between the two other men before looking at Emily ”What-" he cleared his throat, "What about all of us?" Emily glanced around the room between the three before heavily swallowing and nodding the faintest amount. Aaron turned her head gently to look at him “Emily, I need a yes or no, we’re not pressuring you into this, I need to know if you actually want this. Emily croaked out “Yes.” before looking around again and really thinking about the men in front of her and saying “But the three of you aren’t-you’re not…” Dave filled in her blank with a smile “Gay?” She nodded and Aaron smiled “Call it slightly curious with the major benefit being getting a release. Dave and I did fool around back before he retired, and occasionally still sometimes.” Derek spoke next “I’m not gay either, pretty similar deal, I was worried about Reid when Rossi joined the team and it turned into well something beyond talking.” Emily let out a slight laugh before nodding her understanding.

Dave reached for her hands and gently pulled her to her feet, but she hesitated, “Now?” Dave stopped moving “If you want, remember you’re running this show, you say stop and we stop no matter what, okay?” Emily nodded and relaxed as best she could. The four left the living room to slip up to Dave’s master bedroom with his oversized bed that he had originally got because he could but was now coming in handy. 

Emily was gently pushed to the edge of the bed and sat down, aware suddenly just how the dress showed off her upper body and how loose the skirt was. Derek and Dave sat on either side of the bed slightly behind her, seemingly letting Aaron take the lead, at least for now. He bent down and pulled her into a passionate kiss that licked at her insides fiercely, like damn he’s a good kisser. Dave turned her to kiss him while Aaron knelt down and easily unbuckled her light grey heels, sliding them off her feet before slowly running his hands back up her body as he stood back up. Derek pulled his shirt off before pulling Emily back slightly so she’d be more in the center of the bed, allowing both Dave and Aaron to do the same. While she was still mostly sitting up, Derek brushed his lips across her neck sucking and nipping before tapping the top of the zipper on her dress and whispering, “Can I?” Emily smiled, they did seem to be going slow enough for her to remain in control of her mental faculties and nodded. She could feel the air brush across her back as more of it got exposed. Dave engaged her mouth in another kiss as Aaron gathered the flowy skirt and pushed it up so Derek could pull the whole dress up over her head.

Dave gently leaned her back so she was flat on the bed and Derek tossed her dress to the side and pulled her in for a kiss as Aaron ran his hands up her legs and Dave down her body. As Derek pulled back he looked over her exposed body and whispered “Damn you’re beautiful Princess.” A blush fluttered onto her cheeks just as Dave reached up to cup her breast, and Derek reached down and brushed his hand over her other one and as Dave slid his hand under her bra and flicked her nipple she let out a moan, before blushing even brighter and pressing her lips together. Dave leaned down and kissed her gently before saying “Don’t Bella, let us hear everything.” Aaron leaned down over her and brought her mouth into a fiery kiss as Derek’s hand played with the edge of her bra. He ran his nails under the edge of it, teasing before his hand slipped under as well. She arched up into Aaron’s body above her whining quietly allowing Derek to slip his other hand under her body and flick the clasp of her bra. As she relaxed back into the bed, he gently slid it off before tossing it to the side, as he and Dave alternated gently squeezing her chest and flicking her nipples leaving her whimpering quietly. Dave smirked and whispered “You like that, don’t you Em, you like having your boobs played with hmm?” Emily nodded breaking a kiss with Aaron as he slid back down her body and started playing with the edge of her underwear. She moaned as a finger slowly worked under the edge, and running across her the skin just above her smooth shaved pussy.

Aaron could see her pale purple lace panties getting a darkening wet spot the more they played with her and smiled as he brushed her core over the fabric making her moan and arch up at the delightful friction. Aaron pressed his lips to her thighs and the skin surrounding her panties, sucking and kissing, littering her skin with small colored marks. Dave bent and captured her one nipple in his mouth making her twist in please as Derek also started sucking love marks across her stomach. He moved up to her other breast making her moan in the perfect pleasure. Dave reached down toward her panties and touched the waistband mumbling, “Take these off Aaron.” Aaron reached up and slid his fingers under waiting for her to tell him it was okay and when she nodded, slowly pulled them down her body. He ran a finger up just barely touching her slit making her twitch back and forth at the pleasure, moaning. The breezy air brushed over her skin giving her goosebumps as Dave looked down her body before groaning “Fuck you’re perfect, Emily.” Her whole body tensed as she fought back memories that were triggered just that sentence. God she hated Frederick Salazar. The three guys all noticed her freeze and stopped everything as her eyes scrunched up tight. They didn’t have to say one word to know exactly where she was trapped in her memories, and Derek was the first one to react as she shook on the bed. He grabbed a blanket draping it loosely over her getting confused looks from the guys but he just whispered “trust me.” He gently rubbed her shoulder, “Em, Princess, come back to us, you're at Dave’s, you’re okay, you're safe, you're not there, you're not in the alley, you're safe, in a bed. Em listen to my voice, you’re not in an alley, feel my hand okay, it’s real, your memories aren’t, listen to my voice princess.” Her shaking stopped as she slowly reached out, feeling the blanket with her hand and the bed under her, she slowly peeled her eyes open and blinked as she took in the three guys in front of her all incredibly concerned. As everything crashed into her she blushed and hid her face in her hands, but Dave wouldn’t let her, pulling them off and getting her to sit up sightly and look at them, but keeping the blanket covering her as Derek gently ran a hand down the side of her face. “You okay now princess?” Emily nodded “Yeah… I’m sorry, I don’t know, I just fell into the memories and I was cold and scared.” Aaron shushed her gently “It’s okay Emily, we all knew it was a possibility, it’s not your fault Em, it’s not a big deal.” Dave leaned in a little as well, asking quietly “I’m sorry Bella, what did I say?” Emily looked down at her lap before saying in a slightly off voice that caught the guys off guard “Fuck, you’re perfect Emily, such perfect pretty skin for me to mark up, you think your so special you and your famous mother, you’re nothing, you're a whore Emily Prentiss, where are your big bad bodyguards now?” She shook her head snapping out of the memory on her own but this time looking up into three pairs of barely concealed furious eyes. Aaron was the one to growl out, “He said all that? Seriously?” Emily looked at her hands “And more, that was just right before he almost, you know and the shopkeeper ran out.”

Dave ran a hand down her shoulder comforting her. After a few minutes Derek spoke up still in a quiet voice, “Do you want to stop Princess?” She took a deep breath before shaking her head. “Everything was good before this, I want this.” Derek smiled and gently pushed her back down, with Dave leaning in to kiss her as Derek pushed the blanket off to the side. Aaron ran his finger gently in circles closer and closer to her center, as Derek played with her breasts.

She gasped into Dave’s mouth as Aaron’s finger ran through her slit again, just brushing over the top of her clit. Dave ran a hand through her hair tangling it slightly in her long black locks, “Does that feel good Bella? You like this?” She nodded and Aaron gently pushed her legs apart and pressed a kiss to her clit. She jolted at the pleasure, her hips bucking up where Derek was sucking on her skin. He pressed her hips flat with his large hand rubbing little circles as Aaron pressed his lips down again, sucking her sensitive bud into his mouth. She moaned, her breaths getting shorter and faster. He pulled his left hand off her thigh and gently poked at her entrance, playing around it before gently pushing in. He only pushed his finger in an inch before pulling it out and slowly working it into her and wiggling it slightly. Her hand scratched down Derek’s arm as she tried to grab something while her other fisted Dave’s hair as he sucked marks into her neck. Derek pulled back sliding off her jeans as Dave had already done the same at some point, when… she wasn't completely sure, Aaron pulled back quickly divesting himself of his jeans as well, leaving all the guys just in the boxers, and Emily could clearly three all had little, well not so little, tents going with wet spots on the fronts. 

Aaron went back to work sucking and licking and Emily tentatively reached towards Dave who was the closest to her right hand. She ran her hand down his body, stopping just before his boxers but he smirked at her sexily and touched her wrist pushing her lower. She got the idea and tentatively ran her hand over his bulge, smiling as he groaned loudly. She wrapped her hand around it slightly, still over the cloth, and rubbed her hand up and down a bit until her whole body jolted as Aaron did something absolutely indescribable with his tongue. She felt her channel stretch slightly as he wiggled two fingers in, still working her clit with his tongue. A ball of tension formed in her lower stomach warming her body and you clenched down there involuntarily. Aaron let out a chuckled and pulled his mouth to say “Oh you’re close aren’t you Em, you feel good?” She gasped as he hit that perfect spot in her moaning out “Oh fuck, Aaron that’s so good.” She fisted the sheet tightly, not sure what to do with her hands as he curled his fingers thrusting them faster. She started twitching and moving on the bed slightly as she got closer but Derek and Dave’s hands caressing her body held her down. In a deep, hot voice Aaron whispered “Cum Emily, cum for me, I know you’re close.” She gasped moaning loudly as her whole body shook. Aaron sat up pulling his fingers out gently and wiping his mouth to clear the wetness before giving her another kiss that made her pull back oddly. “I can taste myself…. That’s weird.” Aaron shook his head “You taste so fucking good Em, so good.” Dave reached over and pulled his former protege into a kiss wanting to taste her for himself. Emily moaned watching the two of them and muttered out “Fuck that’s hot.” The guys laughed slightly as they pulled away and Derek bent down to kiss her as well as Dave said “He’s right though Bella.” Derek shifted to the end of the bed and cleaned her gently with his tongue, moaning as he said “Fuck you do taste good, princess.” 

Emily relaxed on the bed for a second until Derek brushed her hair out of her face “you good to keep going?” “Yeah, I don’t think I can cum again though, that was like 20 times better than by myself.” Dave laughed lowly, “Oh Bella, you doubt us, Aaron’s going to fuck you until you cum, and then Derek will make you cum a third time, and then I’ll fuck you one more time until you cum yet again.” Emily stared at him slightly in shock “That’s not possible.” Derek laughed and pecked her slightly open lip “Oh but it is Princess.” “How-how’d you guys know…” She trailed off not sure how to phrase it but Derek filled it in for her “How’d we know that you wanted Aaron first?” She nodded and Dave smiled “Easy Bella, it’s been obvious since I joined the team you had some kind of crush on him even if you don’t anymore you were still attracted to him first. Don’t worry, we’re not offended, we just want this to be the best for you.” Emily smiled at his understanding and hesitantly opened her mouth to ask a question but shut it deciding she wasn’t the knowledgeable one here and would let them do their thing. Derek touched her chin though, “Nope what did you need to say, this is all about you, no judgment, no hiding stuff from us.” Emily slowly opened her mouth again turning the color of a firetruck she was sure before asking “Can I um, can I see your guys’ you know before you, uh ya know fuck me with them.” Dave smiled gently “Well I don’t think we can fuck you with boxers on very well now could we?” Emily smiled thankful for their easy acceptance and not making a big deal. In his usual teasing manner Derek laughed and asked “Is that your way of telling us to hurry up and fuck you?” Emily shrugged innocently before saying “Maybe.” The three guys all laughed and Aaron leaned over her saying “I think it was.” Emily smirked, not sure where this confidence came from but loving it. She sat up slightly and leaning towards Hotch, put her hand on the waistband of his boxers and looked up questioningly. He nodded easily and she pulled them down, making Hotch groan as the fabric rubbed over his erection. It bounced up bobbing against his washboard abdomen, precum already poking out the tip. She looked at it wide eyed “Fuck you're huge.” All three guys snickered slightly as Hotch said “Thanks, but I’m also the thinnest of all three, which was the other reason I’m first.” “But you’re not…” She trailed off and she scooted back on the bed so she could see the other two and looked at them wide eyes. At her gesture both Dave and Derek took their boxers off. The other two were equally well hung. Dave’s was probably the shortest but definitely the widest, Derek was only slightly thinner than Dave but longer, and Aaron was the longest but thinnest. She internally laughed at that, yeah sure thinnest or shortest in comparison to the other two, but massive compared to average. She had no clue how they would fit in her but decided to go with it saying sassily, “Christ, is it a requirement of the BAU to have a massive cock?” All three of the guys smirked allowing male pride to take over for a minute before Aaron pushed Emily back down on her back and pressed her mouth into a hot kiss. He lifted up to ask her “I know all of us are clean from the physical reports I got back, but do you want us to use condoms, or are you on birth control?” Emily hesitated “I’m on birth control, have been for years but I don’t know.” Derek touched her shoulder and she looked at him, surprised to see him looking serious for a moment, “Em, it’s totally up to you, this is about you and it’s your body, don’t try and guess what you think we want.” Emily looked up and said almost questioningly, “No?” “No what?” “No to the condoms, I haven’t even had a period in over a year, I’m not going to get pregnant.” The guys smiled at her answer and Aaron gave her a kiss before moving down and sucking on her clit again briefly as Derek and Dave played with her nipples.

His intimidating body hovered over her as he sat up, pulling her closer to the end of the bed with her legs, and nudging them apart with his knees. Derek and Dave leaned back slightly to stroke themselves as their erections bobbed and ached, and watch the amazingly hot scene in front of them. He spread her legs before reaching up and holding her arms above her head against the bed as he lined himself up. Dave freed her right hand and guided it to his cock, and at her nod, wrapped it around the base, moaning as she started stroking it up and down. Derek grabbed at her other hand and guided it to his cock and Aaron moved his grip to her shoulders as he slowly pushed in, his forehead scrunching as he went slowly to try and not hurt her. She whimpered at the pain stretching her, his cock was a lot bigger than even two fingers. She hissed in pain, moving her head to the side so Aaron couldn't see the tears falling from her eyes. "Ow..." She muttered. "Sorry..." He whispered, kissing her closed eyelids, her cheeks, her lips. "Tell me when you want me to go on." Derek rubbed circles in her wrist and after a few moments, she wiggled her hips, lifting them slightly and allowing him to continue. He slid in and out of her as gently as she could for a few moments until she lifted her hips to meet his and started moaning in pleasure. As the pleasure overtook the pain, Aaron’s head dropped into the crook of her neck as he groaned loudly. “You’re so goddamn tight Emily, squeezing me so good.” His thrusts got faster and harder and Emily moaned loudly as he said “Feel so fucking good around me baby.” Emily was already feeling her second orgasm approaching, shockingly, and his dick going in and out of her was getting her even closer, rapidly. Emily vaguely remembered that she was stroking the other two’s dicks and she tried to put her thoughts back together coherently enough to keep doing that. Her renewed efforts earned her moans from both of them as Hotch grabbed her left leg and wrapping it around his waist, drove even further at the new angle. At the jolt of please she clenched down and Aaron cried out her name, “Oh holy shit Emily, fucking hell, damn don’t do that, I’m going to cum so fast if you do.” Emily consciously clenched down this time as the ball of lust coiled tighter in her stomach again. Aaron’s thrusts grew rougher and sloppier as she kept her tight hold on him and he groaned out “Fuck Em, cum for me, cum on my cock.” Her back arched up and she screamed out as her hands fell to the bed, her high slamming into her for the second time that night. Aaron only got three more rough thrusts in before she could feel him spill into her and fill her up. He slid out and scootched around her to lean back against the headboard as his cock shrunk up.

Derek looked at Aaron before taking his place between her knees. Getting a nod from Emily, he slowly thrust in earning her squirming around on the bed, still oversensitive, combined with the renewed pain of being stretched even wider than by Hotch. Dave stilled her gently and Morgan painstakingly held himself still until he felt her muscles relax. He thrust in and out gently until she said “More please Derek.” She moaned as he sped up and as he changed his angle nearly screamed when every thrust pounded into her g-spot with no break. She whimpered at the overwhelming feelings that were dizzying her. Clenching down on him to try and slow him down just slightly, a string of curses fell from Derek’s lips as he was unprepared for the pressure she clamped down on him in her already tight passage. It took only another 5 minutes or so and Derek could tell she was extremely close again. He reached between them to gently play with her clit sending her flying over the edge once again with a scream, clamping down tight enough to take Derek with her with only two more thrusts. He barely kept from collapsing onto her, pulling out of her passage and dropping next to Hotch at the head of the bed.

Rossi moved into her field of vision again, right next to her pounded pussy. He noticed her eyes fluttering and tilted her head up, “Can you go one more round, Bella?” She nodded with a slight smile, “Oh yes, I need my chance with the FBI legend.” Dave smirked and flipped her over before she could say anything else. Instructing her to stick her ass in the air, she wiggled back pushing herself onto her knees and elbows. He ran his cock over her slit teasing her for a second before slowly pushing in. She whimpered and her arms gave out at the new pain of being practically torn in half with his girth. So maybe that was dramatic but it sure as hell felt that way. After a few thrusts the pain dissipated and he started pounding into her harder and harder. He pushed her legs farther apart with his hands, as he pecked her back with kisses, briefly sucking on different spots. He stopped kissing short enough to say “You’re so good for us Bella, so fucking good for us.” Emily moaned at the praise loving the warm feeling it filled her with. Dave’s powerful hands dug into her hips as he powered into her, no doubt leaving bruises but she didn’t care. The feeling coiled tightly in her stomach again as her core was starting to ache from being so oversensitive, but still enjoying the feeling of him filling her so deeply, so frantically. He slammed in especially hard and the ball exploded and as she clamped down on his cock filling her channel, Dave’s high crashed down at the same time, hsi short spastic thrusts drawing out her final high. “Fuck, so good Bella, so gorgeous.” he cursed as he unloaded into her, making her moan again at the praise. Emily collapsed down on the bed thoroughly exhausted as Dave followed her, laying next to her. 

Emily smiled when Aaron and Derek both moved to lay down next to her and Dave and she was closing her eyes when Derek nudged her shoulder. She whined “What Derek, I need sleep.” The three guys smiled, satisfied with themselves and Derek couldn’t resist jabbing “Better night than getting blackout drunk in your apartment?” Emily stuck her tongue out at him “Yes it was, happy?” “Very, but I was nudging you because you should go to the bathroom before you fall asleep.” She pushed herself up on her arm as he was laying in front of her and shot him a confused look, “I don’t need to… wait actually I do need to that was very creepy Derek Morgan.” Emily slowly slid off the end of the bed and groaned as her muscles highly protested the movement of pushing herself to her feet, walking, and sitting down to pee. She got back up with what might have been a whimper of pain on anyone other than Emily Prentiss before she flopped down trying and failing miserably to avoid the agony in her muscles and personal area. Derek held up the blanket for her allowing her to crawl in with a smile sent in his direction as she cuddled up between the protective bodies of the men she just shared a fantastic night with, and promptly drifted to sleep still completely naked, something she never did before, but was quite content with now. She muttered a “Thank you guys” before falling asleep and got an easy “of course” from Hotch and Rossi, and from Derek “oh my pleasure princess.” She subtly rested her head on Derek's muscular arm that was closest to her and fell asleep faster than she ever remembered before, feeling very happy and safe.

She woke up the next morning still pretty tired, and even more sore than the night before if that was possible, but that wasn’t the weirdest part, she was nuzzled up in the crook of someone’s neck… she pried her eyes open… oh Derek, that made sense. She was also cuddling around his arm, and what on earth was that noise? She lifted her head slightly and turned it up to see Hotch and Rossi looking at the two of them cuddling and Hotch was, godammit was he taking a picture of them? Not wanting to wake up Derek if he was still asleep, and probably was, since she was still wrapped around him and he hadn’t pushed her away, she quietly hissed “What the hell are you doing Hotch?” He actually smirked at her and said in a normal tone of voice “you’re cute, I have pictures of almost all of the team in cute positions in the SUVs or on the plane, and you’re holding him like a teddy bear, it’s cute.” Quietly she hissed “Shush, you’re going to wake him up if you haven’t already, and did Aaron Hotchner seriously just say ‘cute’ in a sentence?” Rossi laughed and said, “3 times no less.” She was surprised by Derek’s voice coming from above her and jumped slightly when he said “And thanks for trying not to wake me up, but I’m already up.” She bent her head back to look at him and said “Not that I’m not extremely comfortable, and you are a fantastic teddy bear but why are you still in bed?” all three of the guys laughed and Derek said “Believe me, I tried, you refused to let go of me when I tried to move.” Emily snickered slightly and slowly rolled away from him, her muscles not thrilled with the movement and once she was on her back said “Thanks for not waking me up then I guess.” Derek smiled and slid out of bed briefly kissing the top of her hair before disappearing into the bathroom. She laid on her back and looked up to the two older men standing at the end of the bed laying her arms under her head after tucking the blanket up to her chin to keep herself covered up.

“What’s up?”

They both sat down on the edge of the bed on either side of her and Hotch asked “How are you feeling Emily?”

She tilted her head and he clarified “We’re guessing you’re going to be pretty sore, that couldn’t exactly have been the easiest way to lose your virginity.” Understanding crossed her face and though she privately thought it was absolutely adorable that they were worried, she said “Very sore, and like I ran a triathlon in my legs but I will survive, it was worth it. Thank you guys seriously though.”

Rossi ran a finger gently through her hair, “It was our pleasure Bella, literally, but I’m glad it was good for you.” She noticed that Rossi had clearly been up long enough to get completely dressed in a new polo and black jeans, Hotch had put his jeans, and she assumed boxers, back on and a white t-shirt but nothing else, as Derek sat back on the edge of the bed she noticed he had put his boxers back on during his bathroom trip but nothing else, all in all making her feel very exposed with nothing on despite the blanket covering her. She looked at Rossi, “Do you remember where we put my go bag so I can not be the only one still naked this morning?” Aaron pointed to the floor next to the bed, “It was downstairs but we brought it up this morning.” Derek of course was the one to point out “Not that there’s anything we haven’t exactly seen though Princess.” Emily pulled an arm out of the covers and limply tried to hit him before curling back up under the covers and groaning at the movement. As she realized she needed to go to the bathroom she started to push herself up, keeping one of the blankets in front of her before realizing something and saying “I’ve got to know, how’d you know I would need to go to the bathroom last night?” Derek sent her a smile “I didn’t know you would need to, I was suggesting you do so because it helps prevent UTIs.” Emily nodded consideringly and said “Oh, okay, that makes more sense.” She went to the bathroom grabbing her bag on the way, and wincing sharply at the pain in her muscles as she put clean clothes on before going back to the bedroom where all three guys were talking about what they wanted for breakfast. She dropped back on the bed letting her muscles stop aching for a moment before rifling through her go bag for Advil which she dug out, as well as grabbing the water bottle she kept in there, but Aaron pointed out the glass on the side table that they had brought up that morning, which she grabbed and downed the pills with a quick “Thanks.”

Derek rubbed her shoulder and said “Sore Princess?”

She rolled her eyes before saying “Like I told the other two, very much, I would prefer not to move for the next week and a half.”

Derek laughed and slid off the side of the bed, tossing on his jeans and a t-shirt, before bending over and gently scooping Emily up with his arms under her back and knees. She squealed as he lifted her into the air “Derek what are you doing?!”

Dave and Aaron got up to follow the two shaking their heads as Derek replied “You don’t want to move, and I’m hungry, and Dave has a fully stocked kitchen, so I think that explains everything.”

Emily just groaned but decided it was better than walking so she wrapped her arms around his neck laying her head on his shoulder.

Derek gently set Emily at Dave’s kitchen table on one of the chairs before following the older two men into the kitchen, after handing Emily her phone. 30 minutes later the three returned with breakfast of omelets and pancakes, and she was more than happy to dig in. The four exchanged normal, pleasant conversation as though nothing life-changing, in Emily’s mind at least, had changed. A few minutes in, however, Emily spoke up “Can I tell the girls that yesterday happened, because they’re going to know something happened, and I’d rather not lie to them?” The guys exchanged glances before Derek answered “I don’t see any reason you need to hide anything, my baby girl and I have gotten together occasionally after a tough case, why not?” Hotch nodded his acceptance “Sure, I mean I would rather you not offer up every detail but it’s your life.” Dave nodded his support as well and the conversation returned to random topics. After breakfast Derek dramatically scooped Emily up again making her slap his shoulder as she said “I can walk you know!” Derek just laughed “Eh, it’s entertaining and you’re pretty light.” He set her down on one of the couches in the living room before sitting next to her. She cuddled into his side, deciding to get some more sleep on his shoulder. She smiled as he reached to the back of the couch and draped a blanket over her, tucking it around her shoulders just as the other two guys sat down again and turned the TV on. Aaron smiled at the two of them, knowing there wasn’t any kind of romantic relationship between his agents, other than the previous night obviously, but that they just really cared about each other.

As Derek tucked the blanket around her, it prompted a memory from the previous night that she was very curious about. She tapped his thigh with the hand that was resting on it and he looked down at her, so she quietly spoke “Derek, can I ask you something?” 

He looked at her confused for a moment before saying “Yeah, anything?”

She looked up at him before looking away, unaware their hushed conversation had grabbed the attention of the other two profilers in the room, “How did you know what to do last night? Like when I started panicking and I was stuck in flashbacks?”

He nodded and took a deep breath before running a hand over her hair and saying “You remember my cousin’s case in Chicago, and The Company and everything?” 

Emily nodded unsure where he was going “Of course.”

“And I stayed with my family up in Chicago for a few weeks.”

Emily nodded and he continued speaking “She would fall into horrific flashbacks if someone said the wrong thing, she saw the wrong thing, and I don’t mean this to sound demeaning to anything you went through but they would be terrifying to watch, she would shake and scream and beg for whatever was happening to stop, but one time I noticed she was shivering and had goosebumps. For a long time, he kept her in the ice-cold basement, and obviously he didn’t really care if his slave was cold, so she never really had comfort items for most of her captivity. And when you started panicking, I was trying to think of ways to help, and it occurred to me that you said he pulled you into an alley, which would be cold, and rough. So it was actually just a trick that worked with Cindi that I was hoping would help you too. We would wrap her up in a really warm soft blanket and as she would feel the thing that didn’t fit in her nightmare, it helped pull her back, and I think it helped you too, right?”

Emily nodded with a slight smile “Yeah, it’s a good idea. There were so few people that knew what happened, and one of them was my favorite housekeeper. I adored her and she was more of a mother than my mother was for years. I told her after she watched me have a panic attack, and after a couple of times she got the idea to try to comfort me with a blanket, but I was just curious why you thought of it. Thanks.”

Aaron spoke, drawing their attention that the conversation wasn’t totally private “That’s really smart, and something that I feel like could actually be useful for a lot of victims we rescue or interact with on cases if they suffered something traumatic.” Emily went rigid “I’m not a victim Hotch, I survived what he did, and I turned it into something better, going after assholes just like him.” Hotch nodded “I never said you were and I wasn't trying to imply that you were, I’m sorry Emily, I was just trying to suggest it could be applied to uncomfortable victims we interview, maybe a blanket, just something that they wouldn’t associate with the unsub at all.” Emily nodded at the explanation.

The four relaxed for a few hours until Hotch had to go get Jack from his sleepover he had been at, and Derek got up to follow him, helping pull Emily up as well, with her groaning as her relaxed muscles seized up again. As the three were getting their things together Emily sighed “I’m going to miss this, it was fun, and more than just the obvious part.” 

Derek sent her a confused glance “The relaxing on the sofa, the fun, casual not work-related conversation, not worrying about looking a certain way or acting a certain way, just having a fun, relaxed day with friends, the casual hugs and stuff, that I normally wouldn’t let myself have, it was nice not worrying about what people think, like when I slept on Derek’s shoulder earlier, it wasn’t sexual, it was just nice to spend no-pressure time with people that you care about.”

Hotch rubbed her shoulder in the casual touchiness she had come to realize was deeply hidden away normally, but that she happened to really like, before saying “Em, I know we all put up all kinds of walls and checks on our emotions and professionalism on cases and at work, but we do get together as a time for dinners or barbecues, parties, but you rarely let yourself relax at those either, always keeping yourself professional and closed up, and I know the hypocrisy with what I’m saying, maybe I need to work on it too, but we are a team, a family, and we will all be there for you if you just need a hug or a shoulder to sleep on. And no it’s not profiling, but I’ve seen you more than once catch yourself from leaning against someone or reaching out to touch someone at a weekend gathering, understandable considering you grew up with distant parents and moved around a lot, but you don’t have to do that around us, especially when we’re not on a case, okay?” She nodded and leaned into his chest wrapping her arms around his torso but speaking in response, “So I work on that then, but you have to too, you almost never drop the Hotch mask at parties either, just be Aaron sometimes too.” Hotch nodded and gently kissed the top of her head before stepping away and going back to pick up the bag he’d set down. The three left Dave’s mansion, happy and relaxed for the time being, though Emily may have cursed all three of them that night when she could barely get off her sofa she was so sore.


End file.
